I love, love, love this term. I work with a lot of people who have been classically described as having a disability. I hate that this negative label follows the people I care so much about around for their entire lives. That’s always the first thing people say about them to describe them. Imagine having a negative quality being at the forefront of every interaction you have? Pretty terrible.
From my work and friendships with people who have been described as having disabilities, I have come to realize that every single person has at least one really amazing quality that no one on Earth can replicate. Their superpower, so to say. They may be able to stay positive no matter what life throws at them, they may have unwavering patience in working towards a goal, they may have a smile that can change the mood of an entire room. The list goes on and on, but we need a term that can encompass these beautiful qualities as well.
Diffability meets this exact need. It can refer to both positive/unique qualities in someone and challenges they may be facing. Every single person on this planet has things they’re great at and challenges to face. I have diffabilities and you have diffabilities.
- Supreme Patience
- Ability to help people with their challenges no matter how complex
- Excitement and enthusiasm for anything that optimizes the human condition
Challenges I face:
- A natural inclination towards all things sweet. This has made maintaining a healthy body weight very difficult in the past!
- Finding a state of balance. I can easily swing from one extreme to another.
- Fear of the uncertain or uncomfortable
- Fear of judgment or criticism from others AND myself. I can be very, very hard on myself.
Solutions to my challenges:
- I have adopted a low-carb high-fat/keto eating approach. I follow this 85% of the time and it has allowed me the freedom to move past my sugar addiction!
- I deliberately do less of whatever it is I choose to do. For example, in the past, I would start a new workout program and go hard every day for a week and then just stop. I would simply burn out. Now, I make the choice to do less of anything I do since this helps me to maintain something important for the long term!
- I’m not alone in this challenge. Chances are you experience this too. With this one, I simply push myself to ACT on the things I know will move me forward in life and not think about them. Our brain is a master of protecting us and wants to stay exactly where it is safe and sound even though getting outside our comfort zone can yield amazing results!
- The solution here is two-fold. When I find myself being critical of lil’ old me I halt that thought and then treat myself as if I’m a friend or client. What advice would I give someone else? When others are harsh and critical of me, I first try and find out what I can learn from that and if it’s completely unwarranted then I approach it from a place of empathy/compassion because I have no idea what that person may be experiencing.
- I am now at a healthy body weight, free of fluctuations. I have nice, stable energy and I have mental freedom from the desire to be getting sugar hits!
- I am now much better at sticking to any sort of habit change I’d like to make. I no longer burn out quickly, I’m know my limitations and set appropriate boundaries.
- I am at a point where I embrace the uncertainty and the discomfort that comes with trying new and challenging things. This is the place where dreams come true and I am able to develop my self-esteem and confidence!
- I won’t say that I’m not concerned about what others think of me anymore, but I can say with absolute certainty it does not hold me back from doing the things I want to anymore. I’m also a much better friend to myself. It’s nice to have myself as an ally, rather than a critic.
What are your diffabilities?